On April 26 2009, I met with Headmaster Smith at the home of Prof. Lawrence Lessig of Stanford University. Prof. Lessig, himself a survivor, kindly offered me his support by hosting the meeting. He spoke first and explained to the headmaster the reason I had asked his help.
The headmaster replied by suggesting that the abuse by faculty was consensual. Then, as a man scrambling to reverse himself, he protested that he didn't know--a point he repeated numerous times. I looked at him squarely, having good reason to believe that was a lie. Reversing himself again, he said that yes a student had approached him about it. Just one? I had reason to believe that too was untrue.
My gut reaction at all this was to leave before I said or did something I would regret. But I reminded myself that I was no longer a small choir boy and the headmaster, now an old man, no longer had any power over me. Besides, I was there not just for myself but other survivors from the school. Still, I was saddened that this man had in his care, so many vulnerable kids.
After further discussion, the headmaster leaned across the table and handed me an envelope, the contents unspoken. I quickly handed it back, telling him that it would resolve nothing, nor undo the damage done. What I did ask for was a letter, a public apology from the school to ALL survivors. And one that invited those still silent to come forward.
By the end of the meeting, the headmaster agreed to write an public letter of apology for the abuse. He then departed for the airport, a plane back to NY. As he left, I turned to Prof. Lessig and said I had little confidence that the headmaster would honor his agreement. My instincts again were right.
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